About Me

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I am never looking for the typical life experience. I spend so much time pondering the many facets of what makes life fun and interesting that it came time to start voicing those thoughts for a greater purpose than my own advancement as a higher life-form. Thus begat the musings of a queer otter. You can find me in the Denver area as a co-host for the kinky/sensual Spa Day, at various Leather and Kink events around Colorado, or riding one of the many buses and trains in our lovely metropolitan area. I'm also actively recording and working on a podcast with my lovely partner Lady Bandita that focusses on sex-positive culture and our take on sexuality as a whole.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Your taboo is fine by me....don't judge mine.



Taboo.  A word that has not changed in its definition since it was adopted into English in 1777.  That in itself is curious to me because words that resist change in language are generally the ones used the most.  So I ponder why this word, that is so often used pejoratively, has resisted change....

Well, that isn't of major importance at the moment.  What is important to me is why people are so quick to pass judgment on individuals with taboo sexual practices.  I personally love men's asses.  The hairier the better.  Give me ass or give me death should be my motto.  I love sticking things in asses.  My cock, fingers, hands, tongue, toys...I don't think there's anything to do with an ass I don't like.  Well, except pooping, but even that isn't a completely hard limit I don't think. 

This brings me to the issue at hand.  (hand being the operative term)  I have a new boy.  It's a long distance connection at this point, but there's hope that it won't remain that way forever.  This boy is really into my favorite "kink," fisting!  I love getting an ass all lubed up and loosened then going in knuckles first.  If I can find an accommodating ass to take both my hands, AWESOME!  If I can shove my dick in there too it's even better.  

So my boy and I were fooling around on Skype the other night.  Dirty talk was flying back and forth about wrecking his hole.  It was so hot!  And then a subject came up that we had touched on when talking about fantasies.  My boy started using the language of K9 with me.  By the time he got to saying I was going to knot him I exploded cum all over my chest, stomach, the sheets, the pillow behind my head...  It was a mess.  What fueled that massive explosion was the fantasy of a taboo subject of being fucked by a dog.  Sure he was talking about ME fucking him, but using the terms of a dog fucking him really fueled the image in my mind of a dog, maybe even me as a dog, fucking him. 

I suddenly started to think about why we hold such taboos.  Sure there's the general rule of not harming anyone or anything for pleasure, and I would uphold that in the sense of non-consensual harm.  When it's two consenting parties I say go for it, but at the root of the matter I would question if no one is being harmed is it ok?  Could we ask that hypothetical dog if he wasn't enjoying fucking a person?  Could we ask him if he consented to the act?  Does that mean it isn't consensual?  I'm in no way saying I'm going to go out and adopt a dog to test these theories, but it got me thinking on a grander scheme about taboos. 

Anal fisting is a taboo for many people.  Hell, my very sex life is taboo for millions of conservative people.  So what makes one taboo something we're willing to overlook and another taboo completely objectionable?  Shouldn't we all just get to a point of saying what happens in your bedroom is your prerogative?  I, for one, tend to err on the side of tolerance.  If you want to get fucked by a donkey just do me the favor of not uploading it online so my friends can non-consensually assault me with the images of that.  Frankly I don't want to see it; but if you want to get it, you get it!  What my neighbor does for pleasure has no effect on me.  I just don't want to watch.

So I encourage you, my reader, to grab a handful of tolerance when it comes to the taboos of the world.  Let your neighbor get railed by that donkey, and shake my hand when we finally get to meet because honestly I ALWAYS wash the crisco off my hands after I've been elbow deep in an ass.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

So you want to know what queer means to me?

In the most appropriate fashion I figured my first blog post should be a little of a "get to know Otter" experience.  The musing has been partially inspired by a comment a friend made yesterday as we were driving to Bandita's for Spa Day.  My friend said, "Queer is such a complicated term because it means something different to everyone that uses it."  (or something very very close to that effect)  It got me thinking about my own use of the word queer.

I identify as queer because it seems much easier to call myself queer rather than explain all my significant relationships that happen to involve female bodied individuals.  Sure if you want my dick to get hard it is pretty important to provide me with some delicious manly stimulation, but with that being said I have been known to do more than platonic things with individuals of the not-so-manly persuasion.  So I land in this lovely ambiguity I call queer.  Basically I'm saying I don't want to be boxed-in.  Take it or leave it, I'm not going to jump onto the binary of the Kinsey scale.  I want more options!

Mind you all of this is being typed the morning after I gave Bandita a ridiculous birthday present.  I arrived at Spa Day with my usual array of kinky toy bags, but she didn't know I had tucked my urethral sounds into one of the bags.  She has been wanting to play around with them on me for quite some time, and I figured her birthday would be a great occasion to allow her the pleasure of partaking in an activity I had formerly reserved as a part of my masturbatory pleasure only.  Friends were slowly trickling in while wifey was frying some cubed squash when I pulled them out of my bag and said, "For your birthday I figured it would be fun if you fuck my piss hole."  The squeals of glee were exactly the reaction I was looking for.  So yes, my sexual world is nothing too ordinary or dull.  Needless to say the day was wrought with activities that most people don't even imagine.

So who is Otter, anyway?  Well, I'm 31 years old as I write this.  I'm working on my undergrad in English Literature and Linguistics while also pursuing a teaching license to teach middle school and high school English.  I'm also working on getting certified to teach English as a second language in the schools.  I'm a super queer feminist and heavily invested in the BDSM and Leather community.  I have a lovely man that I am LEGALLY married to.  You'll see many references to my Husbear in future posts.  I was raised in an extremely conservative and fundamental xtian home.  My father is a Baptist minister.  I spent a portion of my life as a bible-beating zealot and committed atrocities I don't care to ever relive.  I'm now a self-identified agnostic and have very little tolerance for religiously-based prejudice and hatred.  I try to live a greener life by recycling, riding public transit, eating a mostly vegetarian diet, and buying consciously.  I do not view myself as perfect or superior to anyone else, but I'm trying to be the best ME I can be.  I also encourage everyone to strive to be the best YOU possible.

That's a little about me, and as I finish this up I looked back and noticed I hardly explained the word queer at all.  Well, keep an eye out for more on what queer means to me.  Till then here's some sloppy kisses from Otter!